Listening to: Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now by The Smiths
Once in a phone call, my brother told me that we were not close. That I was not as close to any of my family members as he or they would want. I never attend any dinner, or family get-together, or aqeeqah, or graduation celebration that they announce. That’s because of poor planning on their part. In my defense, whenever they announce these things, they always announce it literally a day or, to as extreme as, a couple of hours before the event. Personally, it fills my heart with relief that when I explain my argument to any sane person—some friends of mine outside the family— they would always take my side. Why? Because this custom of my family, and many other Muslim families here in the Philippine south, to announce a thing before the thing, requiring one to drop all things and attend, is just about one of the most stupid norms in this God’s green Earth. Seriously, how much of an effort is it to utter a few words, to call, to chat, to message, “Hey, we’re doing this... Can you come? ”
Cut to after the dinner the conversation. “Would You Like to Come with Us for Hajj?” It was the first week of May, and we were to leave on the 29th. Less than three weeks to have everything in order. My driver’s license had expired in January this year. My passport had expired nine years ago. My CoVid quarantine ID, obsolete and forgotten because the pandemic had been announced over, was nowhere to be seen or found. The store was in disarray, my depression has not fully mended, I am still very lazy to do things effectively, and I am still feeling the pangs of my exhausting half a year in law school, and I am still very much procrastinating. My resentment towards my parents and their habit of poor planning grew. For this, again, physically the most important journey a Muslim can do on this Earth, we could have planned it easily had we prepared three or six months ago. But here I was, barely a month to complete everything.
There’s also the far more important spiritual aspect of the pilgrimage.
Hajj (the pilgrimage) is one of the five pillars of Islam. Apart from the Hajj, the five pillars of Islam include: the Shahada (a Muslim’s declaration that there is no God but Allah (Subhana Wa Taala (S.W.T.) or ‘Glory Be To Him’); the Salat (prayer), wherein apart from the recommended prayers, a Muslim is required to pray five times a day; the Zakat (or almsgiving); and the Sawm (or fasting). Hajj is simply the act of visiting sacred places in Madina and Mecca, the holiest cities of Islamdom, where all the revelations of the Qur’an were uttered by the Prophet Muhammad (Salallahu Alayhi Wasallam (S.A.W.) or ‘May Allah honor him and Grant him peace), where a Muslim performs the different activities associated with the pilgrimage. If a Muslim performed and completed the Hajj, all of a person’s sins towards God would be forgiven. A clean slate, a new start.
The Islamic calendar is based on the lunar year. Therefore, months recede and rotate with each passing year. The hajj month takes place in the month of Dhu al-Hijjah (the 12th and final month of the Islamic year), which, in this Gregorian 2024, began on June 15th.
What makes Hajj unique from the other pillars is that it involves travel. It is also only obligatory to Muslims who are able to perform it financially and physically. And since this involves a large amount of money, hajj can only be performed when the participant has no huge debt. Or if they have debt, that they can still pay it despite the cost of hajj. A Muslim cannot perform Hajj if it would deplete the finances of their family or if it would cause them hunger or destitution.
Hajj begins at home, with the intention to perform it. A Muslim needs to be sincere that they are partaking this for the sake of the Almighty. And that one has studied the rituals one must partake in.
In the Philippines, the government office that takes charge of the affairs of Hajj is the NCMF (the National Commission for Muslim Filipinos), specifically the Pilgrimage Operations Division of the Bureau of Pilgrimage and Endowment.
The main technical requirements include the application for Hajj, a personal interview, a birth certificate, a passport, the Hajj visa, and vaccines as dictated by Saudi Arabia.
Wouldn’t that account for tremendous preparation? I am resolute in the belief that in preparing for this, one should have planned months before, saved as much money months before, meditated, ruminated, prayed, and learned as much as possible about the faith and its teachings. The spiritual journey also involves a tremendous toll on the body. Light but consistent exercising as preparation is also highly recommended. It was well informed by my parents that I would mainly aid them along this journey. All the same, I couldn’t discount the fact that this was my journey as well. I began thinking about my failings as a Muslim—all those times I had not prayed, fasted, or given alms, in favor of something easier or more tempting.
The next night, my father asked me to meet him in my parent’s bedroom. He gave me a small pamphlet on the supplications of the different Hajj activities. One should say this when one went here, or say that when one went there. Soon, I began to stiffen my resolve and went with the flow, however turbulent the flow was. I was to memorize these in the short time that was given. There were a number of things to do and little time to do them.
I should have known that my mother and father had had a fixer to help expedite the documents. Customs like these are now very rare in big cities, but they’re still quite rampant in small towns. Mother arranged to meet with the fixer, and in a stressed, nagging, motherly way expressed her anxiety of including me at the last minute (when it had been her plan from the start to bring me along). “Oh! My dear boy. I hope he can join us! His father and I need him for our aching knees! We need to rush the passport!” The fixer, with the acumen and wit of a scammer, assured my mother that everything will be done in a week. That he knew this person and that person. I could no longer keep count of how many times I thought that all of these would have been easily prevented had we prepared sooner.
While all these were happening, I received a soft blow. I really had intended to return to studying law at another school. But the call for applicants was to take place in June— while we were abroad. It stung a bit. But I realized that it would ultimately be for the best. I shall be applying for law school the year after next.
With the preliminaries underway, all that’s left to do now was wait.
Had no idea about the requirements for Hajj! And I agree; you should have had months to prepare both yourself and the paperwork.
Re: your first few paragraphs - I've been called "anti-family" because I held them to the same standards as everyone else. They don't like that they can't push me around like that 😉